A Nigerian woman based in the US narrates the heartbreaking story of how she found out that her husband married another woman secretly.
An Instagram user identified simply as Oyindamola took to the platform to narrate how her 12-year-old marriage went down the drain.
Oyin narrated that the genesis of her husband’s marriage to another started when she once noticed a strange message on his phone while they were vacating in Dubai.
The message read, “Every time I see her pictures, it makes me sad,” which struck curiosity that opened multiple layers of heartbreaks.
How I found out my husband married another wife
“In a life that now feels like a distant memory, I basked in the warmth of what I believed to be a happy family. I was blissfully unaware of the storm brewing beneath the surface, until July 1st, 2022, when my world came crashing down. On that fateful day, I discovered my husband tuns2010 had secretly married another woman @treasure_1989 The shocking revelation left me reeling, as I tried to comprehend how this could have happened right under my nose. For twelve long years, I had been married to a man I thought I knew inside and out. Little did I know that the person I had devoted my life to had been leaving a double life.
The first time I encountered the other woman, Bunmi. My husband and I were in Dubai april 2022, soaking up the sun and enjoying what I thought were moments of marital bliss. One evening, as we were on a video call with our kids back in USA, a message popped up on his phone. It read, “Every time I see her pictures, it makes me sad.” My heart skipped a beat, and I couldn’t help but question him about the message. My husband brushed it off, saying it was a girl from his past who had been harassing him. He denied knowing her or having any sort of relationship with her.
Confrontation and Involvement of In-laws
I wanted to believe him, but deep down, I knew that something wasn’t right. I cried my eyes out, feeling betrayed and helpless.
Upon returning to USA, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I needed to do something about the situation. With a heavy heart, I decided to voice my concerns to my husband’s parents. However, their response was I should put my mind at rest that he will never do such a thing,His mother insisted that the lady was merely a business partner, but my husband quickly silenced her from revealing any more. All these contradictions and evasiveness from the family began to take a toll on me psychologically and mentally abusing my sanity.They tried to minimize the issue, dismissing it as neither serious nor deep.
One-on-One with her Husband’s Alleged New Wife
Driven by a desperate need for the truth, I took matters into my own hands. I went through my husband’s phone and found some strange numbers that he had been communicating with on WhatsApp. My heart pounding, one of the numbers i called end up being a female.
I questioned her about her relationship with my husband, but she flatly denied knowing him at all. Feeling cornered, I hung up and sent her a text message, including a picture as proof that her number was saved on his phone as fisayo(which later found out her real name is bunmi adedapo).
Yet, she still denied it, insisting that she had no connection to him whatsoever.
I felt stuck, unsure of how to proceed. It seemed as if everyone involved was determined to keep me in the dark, denying any serious relationship between my husband and Bunmi. But I couldn’t ignore the nagging feeling that there was more to this story, and I knew I had to keep digging to uncover the truth. However, I kept hopes up. Thinking the marriage was salvageable.
On June 20th, 2022, my husband informed me that he needed to travel to Nigeria for an important project. I wasn’t keen on the idea, but he managed to convince me with documentary evidence that he had been approved for a 57,000,000 Naira grant for the(ig exelon_io)exelon oil and gas station he is building. He insisted that he had to be in Nigeria to monitor and supervise the project personally.
Catching my Husband Redhanded
On June 27th, 2022, I found out that my son had also contracted COVID-19 and started running a fever. I was furious with him for leaving us in such a vulnerable state, and I couldn’t bring myself to answer any of his calls. My anger grew as I struggled to care for my sick child feeling isolated and overwhelmed.
On July 1st, I was resting in bed with my daughter when I received a phone call from a friend of mine. She inquired about the whereabouts of my husband and asked if there were any problems in the marriage. I told her there was no issue, aside from him leaving for Nigeria while i was sick with our son.
She then asked if that was truly the only problem in our home. My curiosity grew I asked her what she meant. My friend sent me a picture that made my heart drop –they were dressed in white and pink coordinating colors, looking all too comfortable with each other.
The wind was knocked out of my sails, and I felt completely blank. I dialed his number, my hands shaking with fury. Instead of addressing my concerns, he began interrogating me about not picking up his calls. I couldn’t believe his audacity.
Ignoring his questions, I sent him the picture my friend had shared with me and demanded an explanation. He immediately started apologizing, but I pressed him further, asking him why he was apologizing and what for.
He told me that the lady was celebrating her birthday, and that’s why they were dressed in matching clothes. I couldn’t help but ask why he was the only one matching with her since I didn’t see a crowd of people wearing the same outfits. It was evident to me that there was more to these pictures .All he could say was, “I’m sorry,” before I hung up the phone.
Finding Out More About My Husband’s New Wife
Not long after our conversation, my friend called that they had taken down the picture on. @kolugraphy Instagram page. I couldn’t handle the emotional breakdown alone, so I reached out to family and friends. Their support was invaluable, but I was still emotionally drained and on the verge of a mental breakdown. Determined to find out the truth, I spoke to a friend who had found a mutual friend of bunmi adedapo on Instagram.
Through this connection, I gathered more information that left me reeling. I discovered that tunde oyelade and Bunmi adedapo had been married for a year, and they had just celebrated their first anniversary. I was dumbfounded, struggling to believe the truth that was unfolding before my eyes.
Mother-In-Law Feigning Ignorance
In my desperation, I called Tunde’s mom, hoping she would be honest with me. But she insisted that whatever I was hearing were all lies. She urged me to tell people to stop spreading false information. The next day, friends and family gathered around me, offering their support and condolences. Their presence gave me the courage to believe that there was more to the story than I had been told.
All the while, i kept calling both of them in tears day and night to demand full details of this embarrassment, he said sorry but I needed closure.
Two days after the revelation about his infidelity, adultery and bigamy.
On Sunday July 3rd a friend of bunmi called my friend to inform her that Bunmi is in Dubai with my husband not in Nigeria as he had claimed. I didn’t want to believe her, demanding photos, and pictures as proof. To my dismay, she provided the evidence I sought – they were indeed in Dubai.
Feeling desperate for the truth, I video called Tunde, demanding that he show me his hotel room as proof that he was in Nigeria. He refused. I couldn’t hold back my tears. The hurt of being lied to was unbearable.
Confronting My Husband’s New Wife
Despite my anguish, Tunde kept trying to convince me that he was in Nigeria. I decided to call Bunmi again, asking her why she was with him when she knew he was married. She didn’t have a satisfactory answer, and I grew increasingly frustrated.
I reached out to Tunde’s family, they continued to insist that he is in Nigeria, not Dubai. Feeling lost and needing more information, I started contacting more people through Facebook and Instagram, hoping to find proof of Tunde’s deception.
My Husband’s White Wedding With His New Wife
While scouring social media, I came across clips of Tunde and Bunmi’s white wedding on one of Bunmi’s friend’s Facebook and ig page, Cici Mercy (they also went dubai together). I found more pictures and videos on Instagram.
Including images shared by the wedding planner using the couple’s hashtag, #aatillinfinity. However, I noticed that there were no photos or videos of Tunde and Bunmi together.
I later learned from someone who attended the wedding that an announcement was made, instructing guests not to take pictures or videos of Tunde and his family. This only fueled my suspicions further.
Finally, I managed to obtain multiple videos and pictures from various mutual friends of Bunmi, and I sent them to Tunde’s family as evidence of his bigamy.
With my emotions in turmoil, I told Tunde not to return to our house when he arrived back in America. I was furious and overwhelmed, and I couldn’t bear the thought of him living under the same roof after all the deceit and betrayal.
Family Effort to Reunite Us in America
Despite my wishes, his brother brought him to the house upon his return, and they called to demand for his car keys and arguing with me. His elder brother requested for a sit down, there was so much screaming and shouting instead of him to be remorseful, he even had the audacity to say infront of his brother that I should give him time to settle with Bunmi, as their relationship had progressed far.
He also accused me of not supporting his business ventures. However, the truth was that I had been by his side all these years, supporting him every step of the way. I took care of our home and our beautiful children while he traveled to Nigeria every three months. I would even pick him up and drop him off at the airport for every trip.
I vividly remember that on July 5th, 2021, the kids and I had prepared a welcome surprise for him at the airport, unaware that he had just married Bunmi in Nigeria. It was a painful memory to look back on, knowing what I knew now.
Betrayal of Finding Out Our Business in Nigeria was Named Theirs
I later found out that all the family businesses I thought we had in nigeria were actually registered in both Tunde and Bunmi’s names.
The overwhelming betrayal, deception, and heartache ultimately led me to file for divorce. I couldn’t bear to stay in a marriage that had caused me so much pain and misery. For the sake of my safety and sanity, I knew I had to let go and start a new chapter in my life, focusing on my children.
and finding happiness once again. The tension and fighting became unbearable for the kids and me, so I made the difficult decision to move out of the house.
Leaving our home took a toll on my children. Their school performance suffered, and the emotional trauma led to countless sleepless nights for all of us. I would often hear them crying in the middle of the night, and it broke my heart to see them in such distress.
Even when I tried to sleep, I was plagued by nightmares in which I was strangled, murdered and killed. The weight of everything that had happened seemed to haunt every moment of my life.
Threats From My Husband on Our Kids
To make matters worse, Tunde, in a moment of anger while he was still in Nigeria, had threatened the kids, saying that he would ensure they were taken to a foster home because he didn’t care for them anymore. This cruel and thoughtless statement further exacerbated the pain and suffering my children and I were experiencing.
Stalking from My Husband’s Wife
In December 2022, I discovered that Bunmi had been following me and my friends on Instagram under the username @btbrainmakeover.’ It was unsettling to know that she was monitoring my life, even after everything that had happened.
Tunde on the other hand has taken my name and middle name, my mother’s name and middle name with the three kids name to a cleric couple with the diabolic stuffs I found in the house. They both threatened that they will make sure I suffer. I’m crying out if anything happens to me and my three kids ,they are all behind it.