How I became my father’s favorite after he abandoned me for years

A Nigerian lady narrates how she ended up moving to Lagos State without knowing anyone after she was abandoned by her father over her inability to get admission into the university.

A social media user identified as @Debbiepaul002 took to the X platform to narrate the life challenges that befell her after finishing her secondary education.

debbie paul

According to Debbie, her father was a disciplinary man who was hellbent on judging her based on her academic struggle to get an admission despite being bright.

At a point, the emotional abuse got to the top of her chest, prompting her to leave the Northern part of Nigeria to Lagos.

How I moved to Lagos without knowing anybody

“Finished secondary school at age 14, couldn’t get admission even in my state. My younger siblings who were behind, had already moved in2 the university. My dad will always tell me, “You will sit in this house & watch your juniors graduate. You will be the one to serve them.”

He would say these words & more in their presence after morning devotion. And it wasn’t as if I had a bad results, both WAEC & NECO was good yet I couldn’t get admission & I kept trying.

I started okrika business, did salesgirl, and even worked as a waitress in a hotel,
Just to get myself busy & to reduce the banters from home. Yet, it never solved it. No one cared if I returned home from work or not. My dad is a disciplinarian, & he has some archaic ideologies about life generally. He wasn’t in support of me working or doing business.

It was depressing. 2-4 years down the line, I decided to leave for Lagos because I heard there are many opportunities there compared to North. On a fateful night, I left my parents house to Lagos. Sadly enough, no one in my family called me to ask my whereabout.
It was only my kid bro who called me with a friend’s phone when he noticed my absence for some days.

The journey was long, I arrived Lagos the next day by 6pm. I had absolutely nowhere to sleep & I did not even know a single soul. All that mattered was that I was away from home.

Meanwhile, during the journey, there was this pastor who sat beside me in the bus. After exchanging pleasantries, he asked me if this was my 1st time to Lagos. I lied, & told him it wasn’t, and I was going to meet my aunt. I heard a lot about disclosing being a JJC to people.

Whenever the bus stopped for us to eat or pee, he’ll always want to engage me in discussions like being inquisitive about where my aunt stays, where am coming from etc. When we got to Lagos at about 6pm I took my bag & sat close to other buses as if I was waiting for someone.

My plan was to sleep at the park after everyone is gone, I was exhausted & hungry. This pastor walked up to me & suggested I call my aunt so she could pick me as it was getting late, & he wouldn’t want to leave me here alone cos it might be dangerous for a girl my age.

I faked making calls hoping this man would leave me alone, yet he waited. When I noticed it was running into night, I finally opened to him that I had no one & nowhere to go. That was how I followed him to his family house. Guess what? His house was filled up with relatives who
were staying with him & his wife, just like my dad’s. My stay wasn’t a funny experience at all

But the good part was that, he got me connected to someone for a job, & secured the admission I always dreamed & wished 4 after 6-8 years of waiting, & I’ll be graduating in few months.

Aside being a graduate in a few months time, I am taking up the responsibilities of my siblings & cousins. These people literally reach out to me for their responsibilities. Some of them had spill overs in school, others couldn’t forge ahead after school, some no job.

The achievements I’ve made so far, none of them have ever gotten close to that. I am now my dad’s favorite child. My opinion is now valid at home. Whatever decision that needs to made, has to be discussed with me. I’m not even the first child of my parents.

Unless your efforts work out and results are seen, no one would believe you tried your best. God is still helping me🙏.”

How I became my father's favorite after he abandoned me for years - Lady

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